The Week Before Your Wedding: Logistics Edition
At Tapestry, we talk a lot about the intersection of logistical prowess and emotional experience. Acknowledging those two facets of the human experience makes us and our couples feel more whole and seen. So in true Tapestry fashion, today we are talking about what the week before your wedding might look like. Our writing is based on years of experience working with clients on the ramp up to their nuptials. This particular blog is a peek at the logistical side of the coin. We encourage you to follow this up with the sister blog that addresses the emotional experience to get the full 360 degree experience coming May 2022. ;)
Because we are focused on logistical know-how, we are going to deliver a big dose of knowledge. The last thing you need at this point is another checklist to follow, so read this list as a primer to check in with your preparedness and address any gaps that may exist. Based in our experience, here are things that happen the week of your wedding:
REGARDING YOUR GUESTS.
You get asked a lot of questions about your event.
Refer any basic event questions from guests outside of your wedding party to your website so that they can resource themselves with answers as they arise. We recommend having a response template pre-drafted on your phone that you can copy and paste (option to personalize) to any platforms that questions may reach you on. For questions specific to the wedding party, we recommend sending out an email with the pertinent information a week prior to the celebration to help address their needs. Include informational items like rehearsal details, the timeline of events for your celebration, and any necessary navigation directions. For questions specific to vendors, either you or your planner/coordinator needs to communicate with each vendor the month of your event to ensure all details are shared and all homework is completed before the week of your wedding.
Your RSVPs become locked and loaded.
Much of the time, we recommend gathering your RSVPs no later than a month before your celebration. That gives you significant buffer time between the due date and your event to finalize items like the floor plan, seating chart, and/or escort cards with your team. It also ensures you hit your catering, bartending, and rental due dates. That said, your actual RSVPs are likely to shift by about 5-8% in the last month. People get sick, travel plans change, employment shifts, and childcare coverage is tricky. Point being: There are things that even the most prepared human cannot anticipate or manage perfectly. Don’t stress the small shifts and don’t let them get in the way of getting the bulk of your work done early. By about one week out, you may be making micro adjustments to your tables, but otherwise should be able to be mostly hands-off.
REGARDING YOUR VENDORS.
Your music is dialed in.
Your DJ/Band/Emcee is such an integral part of the success of your celebration. Even as planners, we take a backseat to entertainers because we know that they set and carry the tone for any party. Given that they support the sound of the ceremony and create the party environment from cocktail hour onwards, you want to make sure that they are resourced and taken care of. Avoid making song changes at the last minute and be sure that they receive all requested information at least 7 days before your celebration. If they have questions, answer promptly. These are people you want to give your time to the week of your wedding if they request it.
You must seal up any final payments.
This can often get overlooked in the ramp up to the party. If you’re reading this article in advance, we recommend making your last payments to your vendors before your wedding day. This ensures you don’t forget and accidentally incur late fees, and that you can remain in that honeymoon/mini-moon/just married state of mind following the event. If you plan to tip your vendors, put together cash or a check with a tip amount in separate, labeled envelopes that your coordinator can distribute on your behalf the day of your wedding. Hand these off to your coordinator at the rehearsal.
REGARDING YOUR DECOR + OTHER ITEMS.
You have to pack in (and have a plan for packing out).
If you haven’t already begun to set aside your belongings in labeled boxes/bins, now is the time. First, you will want to have a bin or two for the decorations, activities, and favors you want to set out at the event. Plan to hand this off to your coordinator at the rehearsal so that they have everything they need to execute without nudging you for items during your hair and makeup session. Second, have a box set aside with your personal items, including an invitation suite, accessories, and other sentimental items. Plan to hand this off to your photographer when they check in for the day to shoot details. Third, have a bin labeled exclusively for your clothes, makeup, and any other items that you want to make sure travel back home with you at the end of the night. A bin with a little extra room in it is much easier to navigate than a bag or suitcase. Be sure to label all bins and boxes clearly with what goes inside of them so that your coordinator can easily zip things up at the end of the night and send them home with you or a member of your wedding party.
Your ritual items are finalized.
If you plan to read vows, be sure that they are written down in a keepsake item (rather than read from your phone). If your ceremony is officiated, be sure that they have a binder to hold their script, as well as any items needed to perform the ceremony. If you are going to exchange gifts or letters, be sure to complete these items and have them ready to hand off before the wedding day.
THINGS THAT ARE OFTEN MISSED.
Your marriage license is a priority.
If you are getting “paper married” the same day as your ceremony, then you will need to acquire a marriage license to make it legal. Every state and county has different requirements. We recommend knowing well in advance what is required in order to obtain your license. When it comes to the week of your wedding, be sure that all fields on the license are filled out except the signature, date, and those related to your officiant and witnesses. That will save you time that you can instead spend socializing and celebrating. You can hand your certificate off to your coordinator at the rehearsal, or your officiant at the rehearsal or before the ceremony. Your officiant will help make sure your license is filled out and filed properly.
You need to eat.
It’s incredible how easy it can be to forget to eat. Especially if your celebration spans a few days, you may find your food-time interrupted by face-time more than you ever anticipated. That, paired with even low-level stress, means that you may forgo a meal a day due to being caught up in other activities. But your nutrition is the foundation of your energy, and there is no amount of caffeine that can compensate for it. We’ve seen nutritional burnout happen and the most heartbreaking sight is a couple who is too nauseous to enjoy their wedding meal. For the love of all that is the beautiful, wonderful you, eat regularly and eat well. If you need one, create an accountabilibuddy to help keep you on track.
Photos courtesy of Breeanna Lasher.
Logistically, those are the big ticket items that crop up the week before your wedding. If you’ve already tackled some of these items, FANTASTIC! That gives you more bandwidth to rest, nourish yourself, and feel prepared. If you have a significant number of items to handle, it is all good. We hope this prioritized list and our advice helps you move through your last to do’s with ease. And if/when overwhelmed, reach out for help. Your community is here for you.