What Hosts Pay for + What Guests Pay for in a Weekend-Long Wedding

Oftentimes, we are the proud planners of couples who want to host their friends and family for an entire weekend of activities and connection. Often, this is due to the fact that our couples identify deeply with the Pacific Northwest and the great outdoors, so they want to invite their loved ones to experience why they chose to make their home here.

As a result, we often think about the context of their celebration within the larger scope of a weekend visit and ask ourselves these questions:What happens for a couple’s guests from the moment they step off the plane to the moment they depart back home?
What makes for a successfully hosted visit?
How can we be clear about what an attendee is responsible for and what they can expect from their hosts?
What are the meaningful ways we can support their visit with amenities and information, while also encouraging independent exploration and self-care?

These are the juicy questions we love to tackle with our clients.

We love helping couples thoughtfully and effectively budget their resources to make a meaningful impact on the guest experience. If you’re asking yourself the same question, here is a template that will help you prioritize and invest your resources wisely.

- Wedding Weekend - Hosting a weekend wedding - Wedding guests

WHAT WE RECOMMEND THE HOST PAYS FOR.

Prioritize your budget towards your primary celebration day.

If you are hosting a ceremony and/or a reception, let those be the biggest and best investments you make during the weekend. That means that you should prioritize hiring your vendors and paying for your attire and personal items for your ceremony and reception before investing outside of the main event. While it’s tempting to throw resources behind an kick-off-the-weekend Welcome Party or a cherry-on-top-of-the-weekend Goodbye Brunch, those events are secondary and should be prioritized as such. If other friends or family members feel strongly about these secondary events, and if you have slimmer budgetary resources to invest in those tertiary events, invite or allow others to step up, organize, and/or invest in alignment with their enthusiasm and desire for the events More often than not, we see family step forward to help with a Welcome Event or Rehearsal and/or a Goodbye Brunch. If, after the main event is sorted, you have the resources to help out with tertiary activities, we recommend lending financial resources towards feeding your guests OR hosting an epic experience on the days surrounding your main event.

Group transportation makes everything smoother.

Not every wedding budget has room to pay for getting people to or from the events. However, if budget allows, it pays dividends in time and safety to have the couple invest in group transportation. This is especially true if the ceremony and reception are being hosted at different sites; if many guests are staying at the same hotel or in the same area of town; or where driving to or from the event may pose a safety hazard with alcohol consumption. Group transportation helps keep people safe and on time, as well as allowing more time spent being together and taken care of.

WHAT WE RECOMMEND THE HOST SUPPORTS THE GUESTS WITH.

It is gracious for the couple to help guests with their accommodations.

If a significant contingent of guests are traveling from out of town, supplying options for where to stay and how to travel successfully is critical in kindly supporting the attendance of your loved ones. For the couple, this can look like:

researching and compiling available options at varied price points on your website
reaching out and coordinating courtesy room blocks at preferred rates at local hotels
pre-booking vacation rentals for key members of your family or the wedding party.

While paying for accommodations on behalf of any of your guests is not expected, it is an option to help subsidize travel for key attendees if you have the financial resources. For the most part, modern wedding attendees expect to pay for their own travel and accommodations when choosing to attend an out-of-state event.

WHAT WE RECOMMEND THE GUESTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR.

Be thoughtful, but let your guests take care of their own needs.

If you take pride in hosting (like we do), it might be tempting to go above and beyond to ensure that your guests are comfortable during their stay. Something to keep in mind is that the best currency you can give your guests during the weekend is your time. The more time you can plan to spend with your people, the more cared for they will feel. We also know that the little things can go a long way. If you have the bandwidth, putting together a small welcome gift with some self-care items for out of town guests is the perfect way to show your appreciation for their attendance. What you do NOT need to do is create an itinerary for every moment of their visit, host all of their meals, or compile an endless stream of entertainment. Instead, we love helping our couples compile a well curated wedding website with local attractions and recommendations that allow guests to “choose their own adventure” while in town.